Yup it’s that time again. It’s Friday bitch! That means its time for another one of my dumb fucking questions again. I don’t know about the rest of you all but I seem to have a problem whenever I go to put gas in my car. Now I usually pay with my debit card outside so I don’t have to deal with the retards who work at the gas stations. The issue I have is when I try to stop the gas pump on an even number, you know like $30.00. Well why in the hell does the Goddamn gas pump never stop on an even number no matter how hard you try? It’s like the fucking thing is trained to stop at $30.03 for some stupid ass reason. Do any of you all ever have this problem?
Over the past couple of days there’s been a big uproar going on about some crazy foreign bitch who was shown on video throwing several puppies into a river. Yes, you just read that correctly this dumb whore killed at least five puppies and filmed it. This chick is the ultimate scum of the fucking earth and she needs to be found and prosecuted for what she did. If there’s one thing I cannot stand in this world its cruelty to animals and this psycho cunt needs to have her fucking head examined. Lets all do the world a favor and try to help find this crazy fucked up girl!
DG
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Okay so you all know what today is right? Yup it’s Caption My Fuckin Photo day and I swear if I have to explain what the fuck a caption is one more time I’m going to smack the taste out of someone’s mouth. Look at the fucking picture, think about what it’s saying to you and caption the damn thing!
Today I would like to talk about the ultimate scum of the fucking earth, haters. Now before I go any further I would like you all to take a look at the definition of what a hater actually is.
Hater:
A person who feels anger and/or jealousy for someone who has succeeded in something they have worked hard for. A being who speaks badly, and/or takes negative actions in attempt to create problems for a successful person.
Now that we all know the true meaning of a hater let me continue with why I can’t fucking stand hating ass people. A hater is the type of person who will make shit up about you and spread rumors to others in order to make themselves feel better about how fucked up their lives are. A hater will talk bad about you behind your back and then be all nice to you in person like nothing ever happened. Oh yeah, we’ve all got someone we know whose so jealous of your success that they feel the need to slander you even though they really want to be like you.
What is it with you fucking people and why do you feel the need to hate on others just because you’re doing so shitty in life? Is it our fault that we worked hard and followed the rules to help us become successful and you decided to be a fucking bum? No it’s not so why hate because other people made the right choices in life and you just fucked around? Stop being such assholes and starting rumors about people just to make yourself feel better. Stop acting like little kids and get over it! I fucking hate haters and really I’d like to punch every one of you douche bags in the face for being so petty and childish. Maybe if you hating pieces of shit worried about yourselves just a little bit more than you worry about others you might actually accomplish something in life.
Oh and if you’re wondering who I’m talking about here let me give you one little hint. It’s someone whose almost 40, and has never lived anywhere but their parents house, but still feels the need to talk shit about me. How about a nice go fuck yourself?
Meet Colondra Hamilton, a 36-year-old woman from Ohio who was recently pulled over and arrested for “driving with inappropriate alertness”. Now one would look at this and say old Colondra here was maybe talking or texting while driving right? Fuck no, this bitch was dildoing herself while watching porn on a laptop that was sitting on the passenger seat! That’s right the cops pulled her over, saw she had her pants down with a vibrator on the seat and that her laptop was playing some type of pornography on it. Nice huh?
I mean I’m all for porn and whacking off, we all do it, but masturbating while driving is kinda dumb if you ask me. It’s one thing to have your passenger give you road head while you’re driving, but to rub one off while watching porn is a little extreme and very unsafe. Usually when I see someone driving erratically I always assume they’re on the fucking phone or texting, but now I’ll be wondering what the hell else they might be doing. The only thing I can say here is that this woman is either extremely horny or extremely dumb, wait maybe it’s both. Either way she got caught with her pants down!
Here’s something you don’t see every day. A 19 year-old kid, Brendan S. Eden from Ohio, thought it would be a good idea to drive 100mph in his old 80′s Pontiac Firebird during a police chase. What the fuck do you think happened? Well he hit a guard rail, flew into the air, hit a bridge, the car broke into a million pieces, he flew across the highway and still lived! Yeah he should have totally fucking died from his stupidity, but yet someone somewhere felt the need to keep ole Brenden here alive. He’s probably going to be facing a shit load of charges once he gets outta the hospital. Feel free to watch the police cam that caught the whole thing on video. What a dumb fucking idiot!
Yup it’s Friday yet again and you know what that means right? No shit, it’s time for another one of my dumb fucking questions. This week’s question is one that I’m sure we’ve all answered in our heads before. Have you ever just wanted to say fuck it, sell everything you own, pack up and move the fuck away to some new place where you don’t know anyone and just start life all over? If so, where would you go?
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